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nope [Aug. 11th, 2009|09:42 pm]
its not even worth it.

I dont know why i even bother. I cannot make anyone happy. myself included.
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(no subject) [Jul. 14th, 2009|07:13 pm]

I wish I could just make you turn around
Turn around and see me cry

There's so much I need to say to you
So many reasons why
You're the only one who really knew me at all

I hate that this hurts as much as it does. and I don't know how to make it stop

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This is goodnight, this is the end [Mar. 20th, 2009|12:44 pm]
All I want to hear is that
You're not mine
You're not mine

I don't know how people do it. It must be nice to get everything you want.

People are never satisfied. We always want what we cant have.

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(no subject) [Feb. 16th, 2009|11:27 am]
I keep making the same mistakes.
And I don't know how to change that...

What gives?
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I'm trying to drink away the part of the day that I cannot sleep away [Jan. 2nd, 2009|05:02 pm]
"You have become the very thing you set out to destroy. Trading evil for evil. Hatred is turning you to stone."
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when did this happen? [Jul. 28th, 2008|11:35 am]
so I think I know too many people. 

This weekend (Aug1-3)
Date, birthday weekend!

Aug 8-10

Aug 15-17
end of summer party 

Aug 22-24
Adam's party in Milford? (if i can figure out a way to get there) 


Yikes. I need to learn to say no to people.  On top of this I still have class, which will involve some sort of final, and a fair amount of work.  

this summer does not feel like a summer. WHAT HAPPENED
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Maybe I'm the original [Jul. 9th, 2008|07:04 pm]
OH NO. remember when i went though that phase in life where i loved Bright Eyes and saves the day and saddle creek records and anything else sappy and great but really depressing.
Oh man.

"Oh great
here I go again I'm stuck in this rut
and I'm not sure how to begin- should I tell you everything?
I'm feeling out of luck so I won't see you soon
'cause I know it's too soon for you to see me-
if this is the last thing you do just tell me that it's o.k.
for me to have these feelings for you
and that it's normal to want to call you.
Oh I'm dialing the phone and I'm letting it ring for hours
and I'm pretending to hear your voice-
Why does my heart always beat before yours does?
After a while you can make yourself believe in almost anything,
so I'm making myself believe in you."

I think way too much.
I had a good nap today, but i hate waking up and not knowing where i am. DAHHHH
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(no subject) [Jul. 8th, 2008|10:56 am]
ahh this day is not going by fast enough :(
nothing to do at work but answer phones.
Class last night was not a good time. I feel like im not learning anything except how to make myself look unintelligent. Doooooobe do
luckily no class tomorrow night. I want fall semester to come, i miss my phsych and soc classes.

5 years is a long time. but maybe its not that long. I dunno. I guess maybe we're just different people now.

MARYANN is coming in 2 days!

i really like sparkling green tea
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dahhhhh [Jul. 1st, 2008|08:33 am]
Im pretty sure no one really reads this anymore, but I feel like writing in here anyway, even if its just for myself.
So after a long weekend (i decided to take the day off yesterday to see my brother) im back at work. and as usual there is NO ONE here. This week is short anyway because of the 4th of July on friday. So I only work today and tomorrow in the office and then thursday and friday im at the store. GROSS. Im actually a little mad because on fridays im not supposed to be available till 430, but since its the 4th this week and we close at 6, i figured that would mean they wouldn't schedual me. but what do they do? fucking schedual me 430-8. stupidest. shift. ever.
So now I have to stay in the city on friday (more than likely by myself) to work a 3 hour shift. And I would just call out, but i have to call out next week because they refused to give me next friday off and MaryAnn is coming to visit. I really should just quit. I just wish i didn't need the money. So now i get to spend the 4th of july in the city by myself unless vanessa decides to ever answer her phone, which she never does. who knows.

I got a 95 in my environmental science class. Im a little sad though because its not going to do anything for my GPA since i have to transfer it over. oh well. I started my public speaking class last night. We'll see how that goes. dahhhh. Im tired. but i just had a huge thing of coffee. Im gonna have to pee in a while. YIKES.

Seriously though, where is everyone?
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(no subject) [Jun. 23rd, 2008|11:52 am]
Im such a creeper! DAH
my social anxiety is getting worse again!
i feel illlll

Today must be a monday.
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